The Biggest Loser Diaries.

Today is the day that 1 year ago, we got our first call from a producer of The Biggest Loser saying they were interested in us being on the show. We had sent in our audition tape on the 14th, and heard back from them today, one year ago.

So in honor of this event, I decided to post some of the emails I sent before, during and after the shows taping. Some are funny, some are serious. These have not been altered at all, I have however, only showed you my side of the conversation on all emails. Enjoy.

Sent 10/01/2007, to Casting

Amanda and I both have tattoos.

I have 2. A tribal band on my left calf (all black) and a tribal half  sleeve (still being worked on) on my right upper arm and shoulder.

Amanda has a small butterfly tattoo on her left shoulder.

I have attached and named the photos to this email.

PS I will have the faxes of the background checks sent to you tomorrow 
morning. And they will be put in the mail later in the afternoon.

Sent 10/9/2007, to Casting

1. Current weight: 321
2. Not color blind
3. I can swim
4. No food allergies that I know of.

Sent 10/11/2007, to Booking

I just wanted to verify. You had my name (and also Amanda’s) spelled  has Harner (with an N instead of an M)

Will that affect our boarding the planes or any TSA checks?

Note 10/23/2007

Today was the first day of shooting, so no more notes till we got home from campus on 11/19.

Sent 11/20/2007, to Jillian

Things are going pretty well…we did not do great on Friday since we were in that hotel, then spent the rest of the day at either airports or on airplanes…so we did not end up counting calories that day and no exercise. It was the best moment to see our son at the airport when we got to Okc. We had both been dreaming of that moment since we left!

We have been working out. Worked out Sat (did walking and a small circuit. my legs are still bothering me, so I’m trying to take it easy on em this week then I will kick it out hardcore next week). Amanda worked out Sunday (walked) and yesterday we both worked out 2hours (walking for an hour on treadmill high speed and incline) and then did a full circuit.

We are having trouble knowing what to do when as far as exercises…it would rock if you had a cheat sheet on what we could/should do on days. Unfortunately we were not there long enough to get what and why as far as exercises go.

Calories for both of us are as follows (we will be updating BodyBug soon, fucking thing don’t work on Mac and I have to use my work computer to update)

Friday — did not track, no exercise
Sat — did not track calories, Neill worked out for 1.5 hours.
Sunday — Amanda (1240 cal, worked out)  Neill — (1823 cal, no workout)
Monday — Amanda (1260 cal, worked out) Neill — (1675 cal, worked out)

We are still working on getting a workout routine, I started back to work today (Tuesday) so we will have to work around that, but since the YMCA is next door it should not be too hard.

There is no way we can keep up the 4-6 hours a day working out…what would be the bare minimum you think we should do to make sure we are not hurting ourselves as far as losing weight? I’m thinking we can get 2-3 on weekdays and 3-4 on weekends. But the shitting thing is that life is getting in the way here.

Oh oh, we cleared our cabinets of the shit food, and spent $500+ on getting good healthy food (we did find a decent health store here that had most of what we needed). Could you send those websites you can buy stuff on when you get a chance?

No matter what the other contestants say…we do miss being there and did put all we had into it (after the first week). It was great working with you, and we both credit you with lighting that fire in us to do this…and showing us we COULD do this.

Tell everyone we said HI!

Sent 11/22/2007, to Jillian

10 hours is more than doable…we are on track to hit that now. Even got a list of classes for one of the Y’s here that has spin classes! Actually grew to like that god damn spin bike…eeeek!

I do know a guy here that is a pretty good personal trainer (not you or Bob, but pretty good still!)

We basically bought as much organic as possible. There are some things that we could not find organic, but not much. As a whole, we have the same stuff that was available at the ranch…down to the same brands even! And the best news is that we even found some Kombucha! Shit is expensive, but worth it!

The hardest thing right now is…I am having a really hard time, mentally, letting go of the fact that we are no longer there, and it’s my fault we are not there. So it’s affecting my working out. Watching the show last night I just kept getting madder and madder at myself, and ended up REALLY down on myself. I feel I’ve let myself and Amanda down cause I did not do as much as I should have to make sure we are still there. It’s the same old story in my life…good things are put in front of me, and I fuck it up, then regret it! I’m trying to get past it, becuase we can still show everyone (and the world) that we can do this (by losing weight and kicking ass at the finale) but its a slow go to get past this. I wish I could just let stuff go…but I hold on to it forever. I think I not only need a trainer, but a therapist!


Sent 11/28/2007, to Jillian

Just wanted to update you on the haps.

Just got done doing a 2 hour workout, pretty good one too! (all while watching tonights BL episode)
- 30 mins on treadmill, speed 3.0 incline 15
- 30 mins on treadmill, speed 3.6 incline 5
- 3 sets each on treadmill, speed 2.8 incline 4 — with 12 lb weight
— curls, tricept presses things, raises (pushing the weights over my head)
- 3 sets leg curls, leg presses and calf raises.

I did a 2 hour workout yesterday too…but I did arms instead of legs.

I am burning on average 3500 calories a day… and am keeping really close to 1600-1700 calories a day.

Am I burning enough to be doing well with weight loss?

I weighed myself yesterday (at the end of the day with clothes on at the YMCA) and I was 290lbs … so I’ve not dropped much since leaving campus. That being said I feel GREAT!

I just wanted to drop you a line and let you know. My “official” weigh in day is on Thursday morning (I’m using that as my high calorie day, since it is my birthday… 29 woohooo) so I will fast starting at 5pm the night before… and we will see how well I am really doing, and I will then mail you my weight.

I still miss being there, and have some demons/emotions to work thru right now that I have not dealt with in a long time… which I guess is good and bad. I had a bad bad bad bad week last week (as you can prolly tell by my emails) but this week is feeling SOOO much better!

Tell everyone I said hi!

Sent 12/6/2007, to Producers

My weight as of this morning is … 282 pounds.

We do have a personal trainer now too. Working our asses off! I’m still sore from the Monday workout! What rocks is he had us run a mile to see how long it took, and we both did it in under 11 mins. Which is a far cry from how long it took when we did it there (took me 17 mins when we did the Presidential Fitness thing)

Things are going ok…we have both been somewhat sick, between pink eye (the whole Harmer clan had it) and colds… we will get back to hardcore working out soon. Luckily today is a high calorie day!

Amanda will send her weight soon!

Sent 12/11/2007, to Jillian

How goes it in the land of Cali?

Goes pretty shitty here, been sick for like the last fucking week, between pink eye and now a full blown cold, I’ve been unable to work out.

Now to add to that, we have had a massive ice storm (http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/weather/12/11/winter.storm.ap/index.html). So much so that we are without power (as well as most everyone we know and most businesses) so we have been hard pressed to get to working out. That is life throwing curves at us. I am going to try to get back on the wagon tonight, but most of the gyms here are closed and its impossible to run outside.

What do you do in situations that your sick and/or unable to work out?

We have still been eating well, and according to the body bugg have been burning more calories than we are taking in, so the good news is that we should not have gained anything but some water weight. But don’t be shocked when you see that we did not do as well with weight loss this week as we did with last.

The best news is, we went shopping this weekend and bought clothes… I am wearing a 44 in waist now when I was in a 50, and a 2XL instead of an 3XL. It’s a small victory…but a victory non-the-less. We also cleaned out our closet of clothes that are now too big for us…and got rid of 3 large bags of clothes! It was so amazing!

We have high calorie on Friday, so we will email you our weights then.

Sent 12/14/2007, to Jillian and Producers

Did not have near as good a week as last weeks 8lbs. Still  lost weight  and you can never shake a stick at that!

Down to 279 this week. Down from 282, so 3lbs. Being sick makes it hard  to workout, and the ice storms have not helped much…but no excuses. We  are continuing down the path!

I told Jill in my last email to her that we went thru our closet and got rid of 3 extra large garbage bags of clothes that do not fit us  anymore. This was the first time in my life I’ve gotten rid of clothes  cause they were too big for me! It used to be cause I was too big for  them! We went shopping and my waist is a solid 6 inches, close to 8  inches, smaller than it was. I am also fitting into 2XL shirts…whereas  when we got to the ranch 3XL shirts were tight!

This is one battle won … we still have the war to finish!

Sent 12/18/2007, to Jillian

Question… I had a 2 day stretch of higher calories. Between my company xmas party (Fri) and Amanda’s birthday dinner (Sat) I ended up eating much higher calories both days. How much I’m not exactly sure…it was stuff that was almost impossible to count.

Would it be best to A. just continue on now as if those days did not happen. or B. eat less calories for the next few days to make up for it?

How are things going there? Getting ready for the Finale tomorrow? I am very excited to see it! Then after that, our season starts! I’m VERY nervous about that.

Sent 12/18/2007, to Jillian

I have been at 1600, so I will go on like it never happened.  ;-)

We have been doing really well. Working with the personal trainer 3 days a week, last night he had us doing a bunch of MMA stuff. It was SOOOOO fun, and stuff I NEVER thought I’d be doing!

My tendinitis/posterior shin splints are still lingering. Some days down right PAINFUL. Aside from that, I have been enjoying workouts, and feeling like a slob on high calorie days when we have not worked out! It’s such a strange turn of mindset for me.

I just thought of something tho… I sit at a desk, each and everyday for work. I park in the furthest parking spot I can so I get some walking there, but my job is not something I can do standing or whatnot. What are some things I can do while seated that can burn more calories? Or stop every once in a while and do? As an example Amanda gets close to 10,000 steps in a normal workday (teacher) I am lucky to get 2500 (thats walking to and from car, and walking to lunch).

Sent 12/19/2007, to The Biggest Loser Club Online

Name
Neill Harmer

Starting Weight
317

Eliminated Weight
292

Hometown
Bethany, Oklahoma

Favorite Cheat Food
Pizza or Hamburgers

Goal for ‘08
To, for the first time in my life, be happy with my body.

1.) What was your big turning point — either during the show or before that made you realize you needed to lose weight?
Starting a few months before the show I had started to notice that after work (in which I work at a desk for 8+ hours a day) I would get home and have NO energy to do anything! All I wanted to do was sit on the couch and watch tv. I know now it had to do with my diet, all the soda I was pumping through my body and horrible fatty, greasy foods (looking through a calorie book now, I was eating/drinking well over 3,000 calories a day!). I was tired of not being able to have energy to play with my son, do stuff around the house. I knew I needed a change and The Biggest Loser came along and changed my life for the best!

2.) If you could go back in time would you go on the show with the same weight-loss buddy? Why or why not?
I would 100% of the time pick Amanda to go to the show with. Not only did she help push me, but it has brought us closer together. Our marriage has been so much better since the show, not only have we never felt better, we are getting along better than we ever have!

3.) Who worked harder at losing weight — you or your partner? Tell us why.
Totally Amanda…she was/is a machine!

4.) What do you think your biggest weight-loss obstacles will be now that you’re dieting on your own?
The hardest thing for me now that I’m home is moving enough. I sit at a desk for 8+ hours a day! I get an hour workout in the morning and an additional two more hours at night…but during the day I’m locked to my desk.

The one thing I thought would be an obstacle but has not been has been eating right. The day we got home we went through our cabinets and got rid of TONS of food, and went out and spent well over $500 on good, healthy food. And even tho my office caters food every Monday (usually pizza, or Mexican or whatnot—always unhealthy) I sit and watch everyone else eat that while I’m eating my hummas burrito and carrots.

5.) Who do you think will make it to the end of the show and why?
I think grey team (Trent and Roger) will make it to the end…because they are the biggest guys on the show (and guys do seem to have the advantage on the show). As far as the team I WANT to make it to the end, that would be yellow team (Kelly and Paul). We just got along with them so well cause we had alot in common. I want to see them do really well!

6.) What is one thing that happened behind-the-scenes that no one would know from watching the show?
I think the question that most people ask is, “What did they cook for you?”, and I always have to tell people…we did our own cooking, cleaning, laundry…everything. It was no different than being at home, cept for the food was bought for us and we had trainers telling us to work out!

7.) What advice can you give other people who are hoping to lose extra pounds?
Get a personal trainer who will yell at you and hold YOU accountable. Had I not had someone like Jillian, I don’t think I would have ever succeeded. And as cliche as this sounds…JUST DO IT.

8.) What strategy did you use to try and stay on the show? Why don’t you think it worked?
You know, our strategy was to be ourselves! Not to change who we are just to stay longer. I did not want the people who knew me at home to think, that’s not the Neill I know. In hindsight we would have lasted longer maybe had we been more political and used a different strategy. Or just not fall below the yellow line, but that’s way easier said than done!

9.) Do you think anyone was portrayed unfairly on the show?
As narsacistic as this is going to sound, I think I was. I was shown to be LAZY. I am not lazy. I freely admit I had the hardest time the first week there, being that I was in a new place, new food, working out 4-6 hours a day, away from my son, away from family and friends…etc. I DID NOT handle that well. But then you see a turning point in me and I worked my ass off. But for some reason people still saw me as lazy because of the first week. All I can do is prove I’m not lazy—and you will see that at the finale!

10.) Did anyone act differently when the cameras were off?
I think we all acted a little differently, just because it can be hard to get used to being comfortable in front of the cameras.

Sent 12/19/2007, to Producers

Watched the finale last night, it was AWESOME! Got me VERY excited to see where I can take my body!

Saw our season preview too… did they HAVE to use me falling on the treadmill?   :-)

I will be weighing in on Sat this week, can I send you my weight then?

Sent 12/21/2007, to Jillian

I don’t know whats up, I don’t know if I’m just a big sissy, or what, but I seem to have ANOTHER fucking injury.

The front of my quads have been hurting since Monday…we worked with the personal trainer and worked legs pretty hard that day. It was fine that night, but since then I can barely walk! And last night my son accidentally hit my left quad a little bit and it sent me up the fucking wall!!! it hurt
so bad.

I don’t get it, I know we have been working out really hard, but how come I seem to keep having problems? It’s REALLY bumming me out. Between lower back problems, posterior shin splints and now these, I’m just stressing!

I have been working out hard when I can because after that elimination I don’t want to look like a douche who came home and did not bust his ASS everyday to lose every single pound he could…but with injuries, it keeps making it so it’s either impossible to work out, or I cannot work out as hard.

Please tell me the injuries will start to go away, or do I just need to work my ass off with em anyways cause it never changes?

Is there anything else I can do to ward off these damn injuries?

I did start taking vitamins (which I have to admit I had not done before) thinking that might help…but what else can be done?

Sent 1/4/2008, sent to Jillian and Producers

Sorry it took so long to weigh in, I wanted to make sure I had time to work off that feast I had on Xmas/New Years!

I am at 269. ;-)

Some news….

I started off the show in a 50” waist…well we went out to get some jeans yesterday to get ready for the where are they now… well…… I am solidly in a 42” waist, but depending on the type of pants, can fit in a 40” waist!!!!!!!!!! AMAZING! I seriously cannot remember the last time I was this low.

More news….

While at my inlaws in McAlester Oklahoma we ate bad…but, they live in a very hilly (well for Oklahoma hilly) area, and I walked/jogged 6 miles! I just started going and had a spot in mind I wanted to get to (the lake) and I made it! I only jogged a little over a mile, but the rest of the time I walked at a fast pace and did exercises with my arms while walking, and occasinally stopping to do squats and stuff.

Even more news….

Been doing MMA/Jiu Jitsu with our personal trainer, a 4th degree black belt, and we were rolling, practicing with our eyes closed to get technique. We’ve been working on our knees just to make sure we do not get any injuries, so we shook and went arm to arm. I pulled him left and he lost his balance, I fell forward, turned over, got my hooks in and was able to submit him in a rear naked choke!!  It was awesome!  Now, I’m sure he was not going at anywhere near 100% but the fact I was  able to do that, and can even do the Jiu Jitsu is fucking awesome to me! I enjoy it so much! I seriously think this will be something I continue doing for a long time.

Last news….

My best friend and I are training for the Oklahoma City National Memorial Marathon at the end of April. We are going to try the half marathon.

My best friend is SOOOOO excited that we are back and I am able to do things like go running with him, biking, exercise… etc. He said to me the other day, “It’s so great, when I used to call and ask you to do things [like exercise or sports related] you would always come up with an excuse, now, you have said YES to just about everything, in fact YOU have called me to ask me to do stuff with you. And we are not just always playing video games or watching tv.”

I cannot thank everyone enough! I feel like a different person with a CAN DO attitude instead of a CANT DO. I was even telling my mom just yesterday that I amaze myself with the stuff that comes out of my mouth anymore, it’s almost like somewhere inside of my I did have all this stuff.

Thank you very much!!

Sent 1/13/2008, to Jillian

Sorry its been a bit since I emailed, gotten really busy here at work and at home.

When I weighed last Wednesday I was at 266. My goal is to be in the 250’s by this Wed.

I had to take some time off of running/jogging due to my legs. Per my Dr I should go see a physical therapist  because of all the tendonitis in my legs (posterior shin splints and achilles tendonitis)…but I have not gone to one yet. I told him I had not taken any time off from beating up my legs, so I took last week off of my legs (I still did elliptical cause that does not seem to hurt, but walking and running hurts like a mother fucker!) I am also on a perscription anti-inflammatory per the Dr. It seems to be helping…but I’m almost afraid to start running cause the pain is almost unbearable at times. We also went last week and spent some money on shoes that are made for the problems I have been having…they seem to help so far, at least in everyday walking. They said my next step if this does not work is custom orthotics.

I tried pull ups again for the first time since the Presidential Fitness, and I got SOOOO close to a full pull up!!!! Got the bar to about my nose, but could go no further. It’s only a matter of time!

Sent 1/25/2008, to Producers

Weighed this morning. At 258.

Not much of a loss, but I’m surprised I had any loss after all the  traveling and eating pretty bad and not working out much, if at all, for a week.

I’m 1 pound away from 2 inches!  YAY!

Sent 2/11/2008, to Producers

Weighed in yesterday at 249. Dont have any recent pics, the last pics  we have are from our trip to NYC.

Sent 2/11/2008, to Producers

Oh yea it’s on… I’ve got the drive like no one would believe. 5+ hours  a day  workingout…while still working a full time job!

Still got a bunch to go…but I will be at my goal weight come April 15th!

Got some questions tho… how many tickets do we get to the finale? Do those tickets include airfair and hotel, or are they just tickets to the finale? Will you be sending out hotels and stuff close to where the finale is shot so we can pass that along to our families/friends? Also, do we need to come with our finale dress clothes? I think I head someone  say that you guys got those for us…

Sent 2/20/2008, to Producers

Have the perfect NBC tie in show idea…Biggest Loser’s on American Gladiators!

That would be awesome! I sign up… Wolf is all mine, he’s going down!

Sent 3/13/2008, to Jillian

I’m sure you’ve heard the following words hundreds of times in your life, but I had to say it to you because this is the first time I’ve ever said them to anyone. You have helped me completely change my life…my outlook, my mindset and my body.

You were instrumental in my progress to what I am today. Not in just how much weight I’ve lost for the show, that weight means NOTHING in the grand scheme of things. But the new Neill that is in place of that guy that showed up at the ranch is an amazing transformation, a transformation that I think might have never happened had I not taken
that plunge into the unknown and signed up for the show and met you.

The transformation is an amazing one…and these are not just words… I swear…I’m an I CAN person now. Not just that I can…but I DO.

Some physical examples are I went from a 17 min mile to about a 7 min mile, that’s 10 mins in about 5 months!!! I can do almost 50 sit ups in a minute, whereas before I could barely do one sit up! I just got done doing a 45 min spin class and left all I had on the bike THEN went and hit weights for an hour. now I’m going running. me running… and enjoying running and biking and everything.

I’ve lost 80+ lbs… but I’ve GAINED so much more…confidence, self worth, a good self image and a healthier life.

Long story short; I want to thank you from every cell in my body and to let you know that you are one of a very short list of people that have helped me completely change my life by just being a part of it.

I cannot wait to see you again come finale … a happier, healthier person.

Sent 3/17/2008, to Producers and Jillian

Back on track!  WOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Taking some time off helped alot. Overtraining is a bitch! And an ugly bitch to boot!

I am at 238. That’s 6 pounds.

We totally forgot to take some pics. We will soon, I promise!

Sent 3/27/2008, to Jillian

I had stalled out for three weeks (overtraining) and have not hit even close to my goal weight. And I had a good schedule setup for the next three weeks to hit my goal of 205. Not even close to possible now.

And I just have the fear of if I dont lose enough weight that “lazy” tag is never going to leave me, and this is my last and only shot to prove I’m not lazy.

I know I’m not lazy … but I feel I have to prove to the world I’m not!

The End

That’s it. I hope that read was fun for you! It was somewhat liberating for me to post it!